as seen on tv

by Lisa Delan

My mother loved infomercials—
zucchini spiralizers egg slicers
electric coffee mugs buckwheat
pillows and light clappers hocked 
by late night screen thieves lining
metal merchant displays with 
multiple exclamations—
AS SEEN ON TV!!!! 

Better for me to summon those
expired ghosts than the shadows of
her excised breast, the paramedics 
as they helped us lift her from the
floor, the dilaudid lining her 
purse, and the myriad ways in
which I failed her, the most 
egregious being that I could not 
provide her the peace to die. 

So I turn the channel to her 
full bosoms, late night scrabble 
matches, pee-inducing laughter, 
her face when she held my new
babies—I rewatch Christmas Eve
midnights waiting for the animals
to talk and the New Year’s she 
drank so much she hugged the 
bathroom floor until dad said get up you
bum, I got a bet on you! 

I think about Brownie badges
graham crackers with Jif & grape
jam planting geraniums lovingly
plaited braids and ginzu knives.

Lisa Delan‘s poetry and prose have been featured in American Writers Review, Burningword Literary Journal, Cathexis Northwest Press, Drunk Monkeys, Passengers Journal, and Viewless Wings, among other publications. She has been nominated for a Pushcart Prize. Song settings of Delan’s poems were premiered by Festival Napa Valley in 2022 with a new premiere forthcoming in 2024. When she is not writing, you can find the soprano, an international performer who records for the Pentatone label, singing songs on texts by some of her favorite poets.